From whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love. Ephesians 4:16
Our new neighborhood has sidewalks on the back side of each property creating nice series of paths. As I was walking our dog the other day, I noticed the variety of back yards. Most have either no fence or chain link fencing while a few have privacy fences. As Marie and I considered what to do about our own which needs some work, we have agreed that we prefer the chain link as it keeps our yard open to meeting and greeting our neighbors. This discussion caused me to consider not only our yard but our life style and personalities. In other words, do we live our lives in ways that invite others in or do we put up barriers? While it’s very easy to do for a variety of reasons, Christ desires that we love well living in community rather than in isolation.
And let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near. Hebrews 10:24-25
As I said, there are many reasons why we tend to put up barriers. I’m an introvert so there is an innate barrier that I must overcome on a daily basis. Those of us who have been harmed in some form or fashion often find it hard to trust and, therefore, put of defensive barriers so that we aren’t harmed again. Trials such as the loss of a loved one or family members with addictions may cause us to withdraw from interaction as we try to heal or endure the struggle. Our own sins can cause us to put up barriers as we fear the condemnation of others. Even our illnesses can become barriers if we put all of our attention into managing our symptoms and care to the neglect of our interaction with those around us. Personally, the first year or two of my illness I started to withdraw quickly after church was over to avoid the constant discussion of my illness. I appreciated the concern, but did not want my health issues to be the only topic of discussion. In any event, as Hebrews 10:25 warns us, we should not put up barriers that keep us from interacting with others, but rather should interact with our fellow Christians and fulfill our role(s) in the body of Christ.
Therefore encourage one another and build up one another, just as you also are doing. Thessalonians 5:11
One of those roles is to encourage each other. Encouragement comes in many forms. At times, it is to help each other endure the trials with grace and godliness. Proverbs 13:20 tells us to surround ourselves with wise people while Proverbs 19:20 instructs us to listen to advice and accept discipline so that we may become wise. The two pronged effect here is that we grow in both wisdom and maturity while avoiding harm. Notice that we are to both encourage and accept encouragement. At times we may experience both simultaneously as we are encouraged to endure or mature in our own struggles while encouraging others in their struggle or faith. However, when we allow our personality or circumstances to create barriers, we isolate ourselves and prevent the natural flow of encouragement which comes from sharing our burdens and struggles in faith and life.
Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
Another facet of encouragement is practical help. One of my greatest frustrations with respect to leading a support group was not having a co-facilitator despite seeking the help of others. It meant that no matter how badly I felt, I had to rise to meet the need alone. I had nobody to take over if I became ill. Thankfully, God has always sustained me so that I could complete the task but the lack of assistance did add a level of concern. In contrast, through the years Marie and I have been helped on many occasions with food, finances, labor and spiritual encouragement. Most recently, we enjoyed the help of family and friends with our move. When we don’t allow grief, fatigue, embarrassment, natural tendency, or uncertainty to create barriers, but rather share our needs and concerns, we allow others to help us. Further, by staying connected with the body of Christ, we are presented with the opportunity to help others. In some cases, extending ourselves to help others may become the healing balm that we need.
“Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” Galatians 6:10
God has given each of us gifts (1 Peter 4:10) that enable us to serve others. Using them to help those in need rather than allowing our trials or perceived inadequacies to become barriers allows us to be good stewards of those gifts and fulfill God’s plan for us both within and outside of the family of God. Further, by bearing one another’s burdens instead of withdrawing we fulfill the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:2)
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor; not lagging behind in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord. Romans 12:10-11
The common denominator in all of these nuances is love. Do we love God enough to serve Him at all times and in all circumstance and do we love those around us enough to deny our desire to construct barriers that we perceive as protective? As I write, I have many things distracting me. I need to pack for a trip to visit family, I have debris to pick up from work our electricians have been doing, I have a house to unpack and a task list that is daunting. However, I sit at my computer to write in an effort to fulfill what I believe that God has called me to. I’m overwhelmed, but I’m taking the time construct a post that I pray is helpful to others so that those who, like me, may be tempted to withdraw and isolate will be encouraged to engage with others so that they may become a conduit of God’s grace to those around them. It is not that I am so godly or energetic, but rather I am driven by a love that desires to serve my God and a concern that no other would be confused about God’s immense love for them in their trials or that they would feel alone and misunderstood. Building barriers is selfish act. However, engaging with, helping and encouraging others displays our love for each other and our God. Under the direction of the Father and sustaining grace of our Savior, the good stewardship of our gifts and experiences allows the body of Christ to be fitted and held together and causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.