When Jesus came into Peter’s home, He saw his mother-in-law lying sick in bed with a fever. He touched her hand, and the fever left her; and she got up and waited on Him. Matthew 8:14-15
This week celebrates the 93rd anniversary of my mother’s birth; the 98th anniversary of my father’s birth; and the the 73rd anniversary of their marriage. Yes, they packed it all neatly into one week…with Mother’s Day thrown in for good measure regularly. As I take time to remember them and what they meant to me, I am grateful for them and thankful that they pointed me to Christ from the time I was born. Further, I am grateful for what they taught me through example. A significant gift that they each exhibited regularly was their servant’s heart which caused them to be helpful and compassionate in a variety of circumstances. It is a desire that was passed on to me. As I prepare to make a lengthy drive to visit and help my mother-in-law, I am reminded of the honor and privilege it that it was to help my parents and my father-in-law at the end of their lives. Now I have the opportunity to assist Ma as well. When we help others whether through acts of service, encouragement, teaching or some other form, it is a blessing to both parties.
And do not neglect doing good and sharing, for with such sacrifices God is pleased. Hebrews 13:16
To be sure, helping others requires some amount of sacrifice and is, therefore, countercultural. However, as Hebrews 13:16 points out, those sacrifices please our Sovereign Lord. Whether we give out of our excess or our poverty and whether we give to those we love or to our enemies, any help that we extend to others is an act of love. Obedience to His commands is always pleasing to God as it shows our love for Him as well (1 John 5:3). Further, when we offer the wisdom, talent and assets that we have been given in service to others rather than hoarding them, we honor God by recognizing that we are channels of His grace and ambassadors for His kingdom. Finally, we glorify our Creator by living to serve others for Him rather than serving ourselves. When God affords us the opportunity to help another, it is a blessing, honor and privilege that should not be taken lightly or dismissed easily despite any cost that we perceive.
When pride comes, then comes dishonor, but with the humble is wisdom. Proverbs 11:2
While this passage in Proverbs does not speak directly to the art of accepting help, it speaks volumes to the topic of why many often refuse help. Our culture aggressively promotes independence and takes pride in it. Therefore, to express a need and accept help is often seen as a sign of weakness that is humbling. However, God’s view is quite different. God used the manna in the wilderness to humble the Israelites and to teach them that they lived not by bread but by the word of God (Deuteronomy 8:3). Further, when Christ taught us to pray, He taught us to ask for “our daily bread” and, thereby, acknowledge our dependence on God for our daily provisions. When humbled by our needs, we draw near to God and develop a stronger bond with Him. Similarly, when we humbly express our needs and accept help from others, we are not only allowing God to provide for us, but also building and maintaining relationships with those who help us. Further, just as we are blessed when we serve, allowing those who help us to be blessed as well.
Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2
As alluded to above and reflected in the story of Christ’s healing of Peter’s mother-in-law, there are two sides to help: giving and receiving. Christ healed and she waited on Him. Both are important. The importance is not found in maintaining balance as in a business transaction, i.e. repayment for services rendered to avoid owing anything to another. Rather, it is in the attitude of the heart as well as creating and maintaining healthy relationships. The law of Christ is to love one another. When we help alleviate the spiritual, physical or emotional concerns of another we show love. When we humble ourselves to accept the help of another, we express both trust and love. The cycle of giving and receiving help and the love conveyed in those actions as well as the obedience to our Heavenly Father is one way in which we fulfill Christ’s command to love God and our neighbors.
Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, cast out demons. Freely you received, freely give. Matthew 10:8
Our four parents have freely given to us. Throughout the course of our life together, Marie and I have also been helped, encouraged and supported by other family members, friends, fellow Christians and even strangers. Greater than these are the salvation and sustaining grace provided by our Savior. Not so long ago, I would have been too weak to drive 1,000 miles alone, but God has provided the strength to do that. While I have to be careful to pace myself, He has also provided me with the time, skills and the resources to help my mother-in-law. It is not only a help to her, but also to my wife as she can provide help through me that she cannot provide herself though she would like to. Hopefully, it also lightens the load for my sisters and brothers-in-law who live near her since they provide support year round. This is a very brief way of saying that God has freely and lovingly given to me in many forms and I am thankful when I am able to serve Him as I seek to help others…especially those whom I love.
As in all things, giving and receiving help requires discernment as well as a godly attitude. While giving may not be a natural gift, it should be a regular part of our lives as God provides the resources and opportunities. As we struggle, we must be willing to humble ourselves, express our needs, and allow others to help us. As we do this well, we demonstrate our love for God and man and fulfill the law of Christ.